TIPS, not TITS. perverts. Though thanks, I do have a pretty awesome rack.
Okay, so I signed up for OkCupid like 3 weeks ago now, and have an inbox full of assinine messages, so that clearly qualifies me to give advice to guys looking for women on dating sites.
Now, perhaps I am more picky than most. I don't really mind being single, I don't sit around late at night crying myself to sleep wishing I had someone to share my bed with, in fact, most nights I'm wishing for a little more bed space. Thanks cats. But, you know, having a partner is kinda cool, if it's someone you really connect with it's great to be able to share thoughts and activities and enjoy sexyfuntimes too, so after a little cajoling from friends, I signed up. Perhaps I am more picky than most simply because I'm not desparate for a relationship. I'm not going to read a terrible profile and say 'hmm, well he sounds like a douche, but hey, at least he has a full head of hair, sign me up for a date and a potential future life of misery!'.
This notwithstanding, I'm sure there are a few rules that all women, no matter their level of desparation, wish men on these sites would follow. I don't for one minute think that I always speak for all women everywhere, but I may pretend that I do purely for comic effect.
Also, given that I am not the most amazingly awesome woman that every man in the universe would want, I will probably run out of inspiration in my own messages at some point, so I will borrow from experiences of friends.
TIP NUMBER ONE. This is the ultimate tip, simple, all-encompassing, yet oh-so-often ignored:
'Tell the truth, and don't be a dickwad'
Really, all the other things guys on these sites do wrong fall into the categories of either lying, or being a dickwad. This tip really seems self-explanatory, but as so many people fail to heed its wisdom, further more specific tips are clearly needed.